Sunday, June 20, 2010

Almost Shit Myself!!!


I forgot to tell you guys about the worst experience of my life on the way to Pittsburgh.

So we left last Friday for Pittsburgh. I picked Sam up from work and we were on our way. About 45 minutes into the ride I got hungry. We stopped at Panera Bread and I had broccoli and cheddar soup, and I knew that would be a mistake! But it was soooo good.

Anyways, we get back in the car and we start going again. About 15 minutes into the ride, my stomach is feeling a little crazy. I really needed to go to the bathroom. We take the exit off the parkway onto Route something-or-other and as soon as we make that exit we're stuck in traffic. I'm freaking out. I thought I was going to shit myself in the car. I was having hot flashes. I was jerking around like an idiot. The traffic started moving, but not fast enough. Finally we see an exit. I take it. There were signs for a community college down the road. I was thinking, "if there's a college there has to be some McDonalds or some sort of fast food place around." We are driving down the road, and I'm looking around and I see nothing but farm land and side roads! We pass the community college and I don't see anything resembling a fast food joint. I couldn't hold it anymore. I pull over on the side of the road, go down the small hill, and behind a bush.

I was on a flat farm land and about 100 yards away from me there was a house with wall to wall windows pointing my direction. I hope no one was watching but I was shitting my brains out! Luckily we keep tissues in the car so I had something to wipe with. I finished up and felt so much better.

I get in the car and my husband says, "your new nickname is fertilizer."

NOT FUNNY!!!


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